


Once Upon a Blind Date

by Stark_Raving_Madlad



Series: Once Upon a Blind Date [1]
Category: Original Work
Genre: Blind Date, Choose Your Own Adventure, F/M, Human/Monster Romance, In its own genre, Meet-Cute, Monster Girls, Porn With Plot, Romance, Romantic Comedy, Then each branch is its own separate story, With its own heroine, but just the first part, monsters live hidden among us
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-09
Updated: 2020-09-09
Packaged: 2021-03-07 03:07:06
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 935
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26380057
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Stark_Raving_Madlad/pseuds/Stark_Raving_Madlad
Summary: Inspired by the drawing, "Another First Date" by Ric Quiroz.Jack gets set up on a blind date by his friends with a girl named Deirdre. There's just something…differentabout Deirdre.
Series: Once Upon a Blind Date [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1917178
Kudos: 5





	Once Upon a Blind Date

Jack Doyle was nervous.

His last few dates hadn’t gone well. Not at all. There had been Michelle, who he had met online; she’d been a psycho who had nearly set his place on fire. There had been Zoe, who he had picked up in a bar; she had been looking to cheat on her husband. If it hadn’t been for the fact that Jack knew his way around a boxing-ring, he might’ve been killed; as it stood, he still had bruises leftover from that encounter. There had been Belinda, who had seemed nice enough at first, when Jack had met her in the coffee-shop attached to his favorite bookstore. But as it turned out, she didn't like men anywhere near as much as she liked her cats. All forty-seven of them.

There had been others; each fresh disaster had been just another entry in Jack’s running tally of first-date horror-stories. After Zoe, he had begun to suspect that his love-life might literally be cursed. After Belinda, he had been ready to swear off dating altogether.

So naturally, his idiot friends had gone and set him up on a blind date. _Dude, just meet her! _Bobby had goaded. _I think the two of you could really hit it off!_ Then Dave and Kevin had egged him on, and before Jack could even get a word of protest in edgewise, Bobby had whipped out his smartphone. Oh, yes: right then and there in the pub, Bobby had gone ahead and set him up—without a jot of input or the merest hint of consent from poor Jack.

And now, Jack Doyle, born sucker, human doormat, stood on the front steps of the girl’s house. Deirdre Flynn, her name was. She had sounded normal enough over the phone, he mused; and she’d had a hint of an Irish brogue that Jack found to be both sexy and adorable. As an Irish-American at least a few generations removed from his immigrant ancestors, he found the notion of dating someone from “the auld country” oddly appealing. But it wasn’t enough to replace trepidation with hope. Given Jack’s track-record of late, this date felt like it was doomed before it had even begun—just like all the others had been.

 _Well,_ he thought at last, _this is it. Might as well get this fiasco over with._ He steeled his courage and knocked on the door—only to discover that it hadn’t actually been closed all the way. With a soft squeak, the door swung open, and Jack found himself peering into a comfortable-looking living-room: there was a leather sofa next to a brick fireplace and a TV-stand on one end, and on the other, a quaint dining-table with lit candles, already set for two. It looked… cozy.

The sound of bustling and rattling silverware came from the kitchen. “Jack, is that you?” came Deirdre’s pleasant, lilting voice.

“Yeah, it’s me,” Jack called back. “I didn’t get here too early, did I?”

“Not at all!” Deirdre answered from the kitchen. “I’m just finishing up in here. Come on in, make yourself at home!”

“All right,” said Jack, crossing the threshold into the house. He strode over to the sofa and sat down. But, try as he might, he just couldn’t get comfortable. His nerves were too on-edge. Over and over, he just kept thinking to himself, _How is this one going to go wrong?_

Deirdre continued to fuss about in the kitchen. “I hope you like my cooking!” she called into the living-room. “It’s been a while since I’ve cooked for two!”

Jack glanced over his shoulder and tried to catch of glimpse of Deirdre through the kitchen doorway. He saw a momentary flash of—something rather strange, he couldn’t tell quite what—move briefly into his field of vision and then back out of it again. What had _that_ been? An odd shadow? A trick of the light? Jack tried to dismiss it from his mind. _This is stupid_ , he thought. _I’m letting my nerves get the better of me._

As he waited, Jack heard Deirdre quietly singing a tune to herself: one that he recognized. He knew the melody well, but he couldn’t quite make out the lyrics, so he couldn’t tell whether Deirdre was singing "Red is the Rose" or "The Bonnie Banks o' Loch Lomond". Probably the former.

Finally, Deirdre emerged from the kitchen with dinner, and Jack got a good look at her at last. She was very pretty, with long, straight red hair framing an attractive, heart-shaped face. She had a rack that was impossible for a straight man to ignore: each of her breasts was almost bigger than her head. But those qualities weren't what drew Jack’s attention. Instead, he was staring at Deirdre, utterly gob-smacked, because _she wasn’t entirely human_.

**< Now you, O Gentle Reader, must make a decision. Why is Jack so surprised? What’s so strange about Deirdre Flynn? >**

Jack was staring in amazement, because Deirdre…

  * …[ _had flopping fins and fish-scales._ She was a mermaid.](https://archiveofourown.org/works/26381134)
  * …[ _had four legs, horse-hooves, and fur._ She was a centauress.](https://archiveofourown.org/works/26392090)
  * …[ _had eight wriggling octopus-tentacles._ She was a scylla.](https://archiveofourown.org/works/26393416)
  * … _had a long, coiling snake-tail._ She was a lamia.
  * … _had eight hairy spider-legs._ She was an arachne.
  * … _had muscles, tusks, and green skin._ She was an orc.
  * … _had exposed circuits and metal._ She was a gynoid.
  * … _had huge black eyes and gray skin._ She was an alien.
  * … _had bird-feathers and two graceful wings._ She was a harpy.
  * … _had two hooves, furry goat-legs, and horns._ She was a faun.
  * … _had a lioness's body and eagles' wings._ She was a sphinx.




End file.
